Family language

My family loves to mock me.  I'm the queen of saying words and sayings incorrectly.  For instance once I said, "it's like chasing a dead horse".  I try to be careful but I mix euphemisms all the time.  My family lives for it because once the words roll off the tongue...  they are free game.  My family never forgets anything, like ever.  Thankfully, turnabout is fair play and on occasion they leave me something that I don't let go of either.  

When the kids were younger we went camping.  We stayed at a nice camp ground and we met nice people but being the nervous Nellie that I am,  I trust no one.  Whenever we camped I was in charge of showering, potty breaks, etc because we had 3 girls.  While this mom was up and down all night,  and all day my husband stayed at the campground and slept, I mean cooked and cleaned.  Once, when all of us girls were in the bathroom my youngest started walking back to our camp site unannounced.  I realized she was leaving and called her name.  I told her she had to tell someone when she left so she said, "Hello Lizard" because she saw a lizard at the door and then she left and that was that.  From then on whenever they left they'd say Hello lizard. A few years later when my oldest girl started driving them all around, I'd get a text from them with that phrase, "hello lizard", then it evolved into "lo lizard", until now it's just a simple "lo".  A few weeks ago my husband decided he wanted to start biking to and fro work.  The first day he called me and we made an agreement from then on that he'd text me instead of calling and he does every day when he arrives and every day when he leaves.  It simply says "Lo", but it makes me think of those great times when my girls were little and I complained because I did all the work at the campground.  Man, I miss those days.

Keep Your Children Close

I'm often dumbfounded when I see small children left unattended.  When we first moved to our neighborhood 18 years ago, my husband was outside with our kids in the front yard playing.  He told me later that A young woman walked across the street, down the sidewalk, to our yard with her young daughter that was around 5 and pushed her towards my family and left. No introductions, nothing and that's how we got to know "Emily".

When I was younger probably around 5 years old, we spent a lot of time at the bowling alley.  My memory has faded as I've gotten older and for that I'm often thankful. My parents were on at least one league that I can remember, so at least once a week we'd pile into our car (me often sitting on a hump in the back), and head to the bowling Alley.  Often we'd eat at the BBQ place that was in the same parking lot.  My father would give my sisters and I a few quarters so we could play pinball, or get snacks while they bowled and visited with their friends.  We often hung out in the ladies bathroom and sang songs while the music echoed.  It was music of the 70's, The Captain and Tenille, The Bee Gees, etc. These times should have been the best of times.  But, they weren't.  There was an old scumbag that showed up every time we were there.  I don't remember him bowling ever. He gave all of us girls kisses, hugs and gifts.  The smell of orange blossom perfume makes me gag to this day.  I'm not sure why this old scumbag went unnoticed.  Somehow right there in that bowling alley that man molested me unnoticed, weekly.  I won't go into detail because honestly I don't want to see it on my monitor.  I'm not sure the time frame, whether he stopped going to the bowling alley or we stopped going.  What I do remember was sitting under the dining room table playing while my Mom and Dad were talking and My mother told my father that the man had been arrested for molesting young girls.  My dad was shocked and said he would kill him if he did that to one of his kids.  I didn't know what molesting was, but I knew the man was in jail and I figured out pretty quickly that what he was in jail for was probably similar to what he'd done to me.  My parents never asked us if he'd done something to us.  I'm not sure why.  Maybe they didn't want to know because it would be hard to handle.  Maybe they thought that nothing would happen in a bowling alley.  All I remember is I knew that my Dad would go to jail for killing a man and so I never said anything.  I lived in fear for years.  Even when we moved to a different town I feared the man finding me.  I had dreams where he hunted me down.  I'd walk down the dirt road from the bus stop looking over my shoulder.  I never felt at peace.  Then one day when I was 15, my Mom and I were at the mall.  She had run into friends at Lerner's and was chatting and I went to another store.  Out of nowhere, this man walked up to me and asked if I was "my name" and I said yes, and he asked if  I remembered him.  I couldn't place him although he looked familiar.  I asked if he worked with my Dad and he said no. I told him that I didn't recognize him and he said, "I think you know me" and then it hit me. I was standing face to face with my molestor.   I decided quickly to lie but I felt the blood rush out of my face and I'm sure he got some pleasure out of my reaction.  He told me his name which I remembered and I told him my mom was next door, that I would go get her and see if she remembered him.  He didn't want me to do that but I quickly left feeling shaken.  My mother never noticed how upset I was. I don't remember if I told her that I'd seen him, we left the mall soon after.  And, my living in fear continued.  Never knowing if I'd run into him again.  Several years later after I'd had my first daughter I turned on the news and saw a news report that they had found him dead.  Someone murdered him.  I will tell you the amount of relief that I felt was immense.  That man changed my life.  I often blamed myself for the situation but I realize now that it wasn't my fault. I'm sure it's not surprising, I was super protective of my kids as they grew up.  I tried to keep them out of situations where I couldn't protect them.  I told them that if anyone ever did anything to them to let me know.  Once when we were on an empty beach, my friend mocked me for not letting my children have freedom to run a long ways from me.  I said nothing to her, but I did make my kids come closer.  My rule was "if I can't get to you in time to save your life than you are too far."   It's really sad that there are evil people in this world.  I hope he's in hell feeling really sorry for what he did to me and God knows how many other young girls.  Years later I hear that "Emily" has had a rough life. I'm sorry for her. She was a sweet girl.

 Hold your children close and never be afraid to be that over protective parent.  Who knows where the enemies lurk. Trust me

Easy Peasy Homemade Brownies

When life is hard make brownies.

My husband's loves brownies.  I got this recipe from a long time friend before we got married.  They are easy and delightful.

Ingredients:

2 sticks butter/margarine 

3/4 cup cocoa powder

2 1/4 cup sugar

2 eggs

1 tsp salt

1 tsp vanilla

1 tsp baking powder

1 1/2 cup all purpose flour

1 cup chopped walnuts

Directions:

1. Preheat oven to 350, grease 9 x 13 pan.

2. Melt butter, turn off and quickly stir in cocoa with a wooden spoon until well blended.  Add sugar until well blended.  Add eggs, salt and vanilla and mix until well blended.  Add flour and baking powder.  Once it's mixed well add chopped nuts.

3.  dump into 9 x 13 pan and bake 20-25 minutes until toothpick comes out clean. Baking times vary depending on oven.

Sometimes I add chocolate chips or coat with a nice home made chocolate icing.

Meatless Monday Moroccan Vegetable Stew

I've always cooked for a lot of people.  Growing up, I was one of Six children.  I cooked often and at Twelve years old,  I could make a roast, mashed potatoes, yeast rolls, the works.  When we first married there were four of us to feed from the start.   When babe sweetie and I married he had a seven year old daughter and a five year old son then we added three more girls to our family.  Last year I found myself cooking too much food since often it was just the two of us.  We ended up with leftovers for days.   I often told my husband after I cooked enough spaghetti sauce to last us a week that I wasn't sure how to adjust.  This summer there were five of us under the roof.  Life was normal, but yesterday one of my other girls went back to school so it's just three of us here again.  Needless to say I'm making dinner in the crockpot and it will last us 3-4 meals, but it's a super good recipe.  I try to jump on the Meatless Monday bandwagon as often as possible.  The recipe I'm preparing is really good packed with flavor and pretty easy if you don't mind chopping up some vegetables.  I have prepared it for friends and it gets rave reviews so here it is:

Moroccan Vegetable Stew 

Ingredients:

• 2 tablespoons olive oil
• 3 cloves garlic, peeled and crushed with the side of a knife
• 1 teaspoon ground coriander
• 1 teaspoon ground cumin
• 1/2 teaspoon cayenne
• 1/4 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 5 cups vegetable or chicken broth
• 4 carrots peeled and chopped
• 2 1/2 cups peeled and chopped eggplant
• 2 1/2 cups sliced (1/2 in. thick) zucchini
• 2 cups cauliflower florets
• 1 cup diced onion 
• 2 cans (14 1/2 oz. each) stewed tomatoes
• 1 can (15 oz.) garbanzos, drained and rinsed
• 3/4 cup dried currants
• 1 cup chopped toasted almonds
• 1/2 tablespoon kosher salt
• Couscous
• plain greek yogurt

Preparation:

1. 1. Pour olive oil into a small frying pan over medium-low heat. Add garlic and spices and cook, stirring often until fragrant, 1 to 2 minutes, being careful not to scorch the garlic. Scrape the mixture into a slow-cooker (at least 5 qt.). (I skip this step and just dump everything into the crockpot.
2. 2. Add broth, carrots, eggplant, zucchini, cauliflower, onion, stewed tomatoes (with juices), garbanzos, currants, almonds, and salt, and stir to combine.
3. 3. Cover slow-cooker and cook on high until vegetables are tender to bite and flavors are blended, 8 to 9 hours.
4. 4. Ladle about 3 cups of the vegetable mixture into a blender. Holding lid down with a towel and taking care to avoid steam, whirl until smooth. Return purée to slow-cooker and stir to blend. Ladle stew into a tureen or individual bowls. 

Serve over Couscous and add a dollop of plain greek yogurt

Never Fail Banana nut muffins

My husband hates bananas but he loves banana bread.   I'm not much of a banana bread eater myself so after we married I had to find something to do with the bananas once they turned too brown to enjoy.  My aunt gave me a Good Housekeeping cookbook for a wedding present (thanks Aunt Marla) and I found a recipe for banana nut muffins that I have adapted that simply never fail. NEVER!

Banana nut muffins (makes 12)

2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
3/4 cup sugar
1 TBS baking powder
3/4 tsp salt
6 TBS butter or margarine (3/4 stick)
1 cup walnuts chopped (I often leave them whole)
3 ripe bananas, cut up
2 eggs
1/3 cup milk
1/2 tsp vanilla extract

1. Preheat oven to 400.  Grease muffin pan.

2.  In large bowl, mix flour, sugar, baking powder, and salt.  With pastry blender or 2 knives used scissor fashion, cut in butter until mixture resembles coarse crumbs, stir in walnuts; set aside.  In separate bowl, mash bananas with potato masher, and eggs, vanilla and milk until well blended.  Stir banana mixture into flour mixture and mix until flour is moistened (batter will be lumpy).

3.  Spoon batter into muffin pan cups. Bake 18-25 minutes (all ovens are different) until golden brown.  Immediately remove muffins from tins and cool or serve warm.

Easy Homemade Stromboli

Friday nights tend to be Pizza Friday around here.  I usually make home made pizza but last night I decided to stray from normal since "the baby" wasn't here.  I ended up making stromboli.  I decided to throw it together and it was my favorite stromboli yet.  Here is the recipe:

2 balls of pizza dough (I pulled out 2 from my freezer) Makes 2 

pizza sauce (I used tomato paste and added spices)

1/2 lb italian sausage (cooked)

pepperoni

fresh mushrooms (chop and cook these in olive oil)

fresh chopped onion

fresh chopped green pepper

italian seasoning to taste

shredded mozzarella (I used 1 1/2 cups roughly)

Preheat oven to 400 and grease your cookie sheet. Roll out each dough to 12 x 8.  Spread the sauce to within two inches of sides.  Layer 3 rows of pepperoni up to 1 inch of sides, sprinkle with remaining ingredients.  Roll up longways and place on cookie sheet. Bake 15-20 minutes.

What to do, what to do.

Yesterday my last child left for college.  I knew it was coming.  This was no surprise.  I wish I'd known how hard it would be so I could brace myself.   She is the last one to leave.  So.  Now I find myself wondering what I'm going to do with the rest of my life.

First let me tell you about me.  I'm a 45 year old woman that married at 21 to a man that already had two kids.  They were a package deal.  I was going to school full time and working full time when my Babe Sweetie entered the picture.  We ended up having 3 more kids.  Then much to my dismay we  moved from a small country town into the big scary city.  His desire is to leave one day and live on a mountain where the weather is cooler, the people are nicer and he can have land.  I turned from a country girl into a city girl and frankly I'd prefer to stay close to the kids and our grandchildren.

Growing up I had dreams and ideas.  I knew that I eventually wanted to marry, have kids and live happily ever after. You know, what every one truly wants.  I look back at those times and feel like I was more or less prepared.  However, now I find myself in a brand new place in life.  A new chapter if you will.  This is the first time in my life that I feel like I don't know what's coming. And funnily enough with as much time as I invested in raising my kids, preparing them for life, I find myself ill prepared.